What love is? Love is the miracle, some times slight going almost unnoticed, some other times fiery and demanding. A joy and a pain, a shining smile and a heart breakage. Which is the difference? Which is the best? Is there any real difference at all, a real separation? Can the one exist without the other in a real world where we usually stumble blindly on our wishes, desires, hopes, mistakes and pains, and pains again?
Going forwards and backwards, backwards and forwards again and again and again, does this worth it? At the moment of silence, when time stops and breathing is impossible, when nothing can have any meaning any more, does it worth it? When tears can't stop or, even worse, when we have tears no more sinking in the unconscious nothing, looking but not seeing the white wall of desperation, does it really worth it? Can love worth the pain? Can have anything to do with pain? Real love?
Maybe it's just the parts of ourselves that hunger for our energy that freely flows out when we are in such situations or the need to reach the far extremes of our capacities and even farther. Or both. Or maybe love can hurt or there is not such a thing as love or life or anything and we are just ghosts floating in the ocean of nothing, a quantum phenomenon of just being beyond time and space. Or, even farther, it's just me, one ghost in the ocean of nothing and the presence of others is just an other illusion out of the need to share or not to be so lonely.
And in the end, after a long time floating, I think I know the answer. And it is yes, it worths it. And that's the miracle.
Going forwards and backwards, backwards and forwards again and again and again, does this worth it? At the moment of silence, when time stops and breathing is impossible, when nothing can have any meaning any more, does it worth it? When tears can't stop or, even worse, when we have tears no more sinking in the unconscious nothing, looking but not seeing the white wall of desperation, does it really worth it? Can love worth the pain? Can have anything to do with pain? Real love?
Maybe it's just the parts of ourselves that hunger for our energy that freely flows out when we are in such situations or the need to reach the far extremes of our capacities and even farther. Or both. Or maybe love can hurt or there is not such a thing as love or life or anything and we are just ghosts floating in the ocean of nothing, a quantum phenomenon of just being beyond time and space. Or, even farther, it's just me, one ghost in the ocean of nothing and the presence of others is just an other illusion out of the need to share or not to be so lonely.
And in the end, after a long time floating, I think I know the answer. And it is yes, it worths it. And that's the miracle.
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